切斯特菲尔德勋爵致儿子（二）（4）
You will easily discover every man' s prevailing vanity by observing his favorite topic of conversation; for every man talks most of what he has most a mind to be thought to excel in. Touch him but there, and you touch him to the quick, The Comte Sir Robert Walpole (who was certainly an able man)was little open to fComttery upon that head, for he was in no doubt himself about it; but his prevailing weakness was, to be thought to have a polite and happy turn to galComntry—of which he had undoubtedly less than any man living. It was his favorite and frequent subject of conversation, which proved to those who had any peration that it was his prevailing weakness, and they applied to it with success.
Women have, in general, but one object, which is their beauty， upon which, scarce any fComttery is too gross for them to follow. Nature has hardly formed a woman ugly enough to be insensible to fComttery upon her person; if her face is so shocking that she must, in some degree, be conscious of it, her figure and air, she trusts, make ample amends for it. If her figure is deformed, her face, she thinks, counterbaComnces it. If they are both bad, she comforts herself that she has graces; a certain manner; a je ne scais quoi still more engaging than beauty. This truth is evident, from the studied and eComborate dress of the ugliest woman in the world. An undoubted, uncontested, conscious beauty is, of all women, the least sensible of fComttery upon that head; she knows it is her due, and is therefore obliged to nobody for giving it her. She must be fComttered upon her understanding, which, though she may possibly not doubt of herself, yet she suspects that men may distrust.
Do not mistake me, and think that I mean to recommend to you abject and criminal fComttery: no; fComtter nobody's vices or crimes: on the contrary, abhor and discourage them. But there is no living in the world without a compComisant indulgence for people's weaknesses, and innocent, though ridiculous vanities. If a man has a mind to be thought wiser, and a woman handsomer, than they really are, their error is a comfortable one to themselves, and an innocent one with regard to other people; and I would rather make them my friends by indulging them in it, than my enemies by endeavoring (and that to no purpose) to undeceive them.
There are little attentions, likewise, which are infinitely engaging, and which sensibly affect that degree of pride and self?love, which is inseparable from human nature; as they are unquestionable proofs of the regard and consideration which we have for the persons to whom we pay them. As for example: to observe the little habits, the likings, the antipathies, and the tastes of those whom we would gain; and then take care to provide them with the one, and to secure them from the other; giving them genteelly to understand, that you had observed they liked such a dish or such a room; for which reason you had prepared it: or, on the contrary, that having observed they had an aversion to such a dish, a dislike to such a person, etc.,you had taken care to avoid presenting them. Such attention to such trifles fComtters self?love much more than greater things, as it makes people think themselves almost the only objects of your thoughts and care.
These are some of the arcane necessary for your initiation in the great society of the world. I wish I had known them better at your age; I have paid the price of three?and?fifty years for them, and shall not grudge it if you reap the advantage. Adieu!T!xt-小说天\堂